II

Sdermila dropped the wooden spoon she was using to taste the kalashiri stew. That last explosion had sounded closer than ever, making the glass of the window tremble and startling her. She cursed angrily between her teeth, and recovered the spoon with trembling hands. She had to admit she was starting to worry. "Don't be a fool, old woman," she muttered to herself, "scared is what you are."

Talking to herself was something that Sdermila did often since his husband, her dear Taigor, died fifteen years ago. It was an stupid accident. Their kalahorse was bitten by an insect while they were harvesting the grain and got nervous. Taigor tried to calm it down, and made the fatal mistake of approaching it from behind, something he always taught the kids not to do. It kicked him plain on the chest, before Sdermila's eyes. She and Taigor used to talk to each other all the time when they were together. Those first months without Taigor, Sdermila had started to talk to herself when she was alone. She didn't even pretend to be talking to him, it was just that, some times, she could not bear the silence any more. It finally become an habit for her, although she took care not to do it when someone could hear it, especially one of her sons. None of them were here now. She looked at the window with apprehension, and said aloud what she had only thought so far. "Had you not been so damn stubborn, you would be with Jeiran, Voeda and the kids, visiting your ancestors' home in Balania by now. But no, you had to be stronger, more valiant than any one."

Three days ago, her son Jeiran had come to tell her to come with him and his family. They had arranged passage to Balania on a freighter that would depart in two days from Nurtina spaceport. She had asked him what was he so frightened of, and he had asked back if she had not seen the news about what the Seibergians were doing on the frontiers. "No, I haven't seen them," she had lied, "what do they say that can be of importance here, in the countryside?" Then Jeiran had started to tell her about the atrocities their people were suffering at the hands of the Seibergian paramilitary, until she had refused to continue listening.  Sdermila tried to solve the matter, saying "that's pretty far from here." Jeiran had answered "two hundred kilometers is a long distance if you have to walk, or even ride that old beast you still use to labor the ground, but it's nothing for a bomber or a speeder-tank." He had continued explaining that, even now, regular troops were being sent by the Seibergian planetary government – which of course had not a single Balanish among its members. Those troops were supposed to mediate and end the "incidents" in the Balanish Region, as they called the murders, the rapes and the house burning, but they were actually supporting the paramilitary groups. In more and more small villages, the Balanish population was being driven out of their homes, with no place to go, or killed, if they dared to resist. "That won't happen here, Jeiran," Sdermila had said, "we and our Seibergian neighbors have always lived in peace. Do you imagine the Kilovich, the Sirilenki, or the Torsken, trying to set fire to our house? Oh, please, Jeiran, you and your brother Lania have played with their children!" She had immediately regretted mentioning her other son in this context. Her son's expression hardened. "Yes, we played with them!" Jeiran exclaimed angrily. "But we grew up, mother. Lania, despite graduating at the top of his class at the Technical University, had to travel to Commenor to find a job worth his capacity, a job that here he only would have gotten had he been named Kilovich, Sirilenki, or Torsken, for instance!"

Sdermila could not answer to that. What Jeiran had just said she had thought, too, but she had never said anything to him. The old wound still hurt. When Taigor died, things were not easy for their family. She had needed to make adjustments in their economy and take difficult decisions. Instead of buying a used harvester, as she and Taigor had planned, Sdermila had kept working with that damned kalahorse, and used the money that they had been saving to send Lania, her older son, to the university. He was so promising! And she had not been wrong about him. Physics Engineer at twenty two, specialized in magnetic fields. That was what the official certificate said, which Sdermila guarded with pride. But, since he was gone, she and Jeiran had gradually lost contact with Lania. Sdermila didn't blame him. She constantly told to herself that Lania was too busy, and had to travel too often. And Holonet connections were terribly expensive. Normal mail was very cheap, though, but Sdermila tried to ignore that fact. On the other hand, Jeiran had never seemed envious of his brother, although Sdermila was sure that Jeiran could have done well in the university, too. He appeared to understand that, when his turn had come, there was not enough money. His petition for a grant had been rejected, not unexpectedly. Not many Balanish obtained one. Nevertheless, Jeiran had refused to work in the fields with his mother, and had preferred a job as mechanical operator in the new fibroplastic factory, twenty kilometers from home. He had worked hard, terribly hard, for years, but now he was the first assistant of the plant supervisor and, the best of all, he had a wonderful family of his own. His wife, Voeda, a cheerful clerk who pretended to be a writer in her scarce spare time, poor dreamer, had become a daughter for Sdermila. And the kids, Drivan and the little Mila, were new life for their grandmother. Sdermila was no less proud of what Jeiran had achieved than she was of Lania. Maybe even more, she had to admit.

But Jeiran had come to tell her that he was going to quit his job, throwing away the work of years, to sell miserably his house and furniture, and worst of all, take her grandchildren away, just because he and Voeda were frightened of what they saw in the news. Sdermila just could not understand that, but she had failed to convince him. That boy was as stubborn as her and then some. What Sdermila would never do is to follow him, as painful as seeing all them leave and stay alone would be. At least, they would have a home to return, hers, when they realized how wrong they were. She had said "I will never leave the land that your father and I worked so hard, and where he is buried now." A moment later her younger son was gone, too, and she hadn’t even had a chance to say goodbye to Voeda and the kids. She had thought that Jeiran would have to beg to be forgiven for that.

But now, Sdermila was starting to think that the wrong one had been herself.

She tried to concentrate on the stew, but it was not easy, not with the sound of not-very-distant explosions. "What is happening out there? Are the Seibergians really coming?" She couldn't stop thinking of the things Jeiran had told her. "Heavens, Sdermila, when have you become so easy to scare? It’s probably some fool trying to blow the old Kerevinia mine open again. Who will be the dumb town jerk that bought it this time? Nothing was ever found there, and nothing will be. This land is good for grain and beasts, but there is not a single kilogram of anything valuable under it. If Taigor were here, he would be rolling on the floor unable to stop the laughter..." Another explosion, even closer this time, made her lose the spoon again. Something had broken upstairs. Now she didn't care to recover the spoon and put the flame control at the lower position. Sdermila headed to the outer door. She had to see what was going on in the village with her very eyes.

The first thing she noticed was the smoke. The weather was cold enough to have the windows closed, and that had prevented her from smelling it. Now she could see it. The thickest column came from the other side of the village, more or less where the Volodir farm was located, but there were other places in flames. One of them, Sdermila realized, horrified, was the primary school. "Have everybody gone crazy? There must be children there!" Suddenly, a speeder roared along the road coming from the village, quickly disappearing from sight. It was followed by two more, and then nothing. Usually, Sdermila would have wondered where the occupants were going to be such in a hurry, but now she didn't doubt they were not going, they were escaping. People had come out from the scattered houses surrounding Sdermila's before she did, and many of them were looking at the route. Now she could distinguish a crowd abandoning the village, walking or even running. There were also a couple of kalahorses and even a small harvester. The whine of blaster bursts could be heard in the distance.

"We've got to get out of here, Sdermila!" Her neighbor Redina cried out at her, her voice revealing how close she was to hysteria. A couple of men took rifles and waited near their houses, but most people were simply running away, using the fastest way of locomotion they had at hand. In many cases that was on foot. Sdermila refused to panic. There was probably no reason to leave their homes. If the Seibergians came, they would see they were nothing but farmers. They were not a danger for anybody so they would not be bothered.

Sdermila stayed where she was for some moments, watching the route. She was about to return home again when she spotted two military vehicles approaching. As they advanced, people were forced to move away from the route to avoid being rammed. Not far from where Sdermila stood, one of the men carrying a rifle exclaimed "bastards!". Sdermila knew him well, as she knew all her neighbors. "I wonder what that stupid Divanian and the others are expecting to do with their old rifles against a speeder-tank", she muttered. Kaliga, Divanina's wife, was trying to convince him about dropping his weapon and escaping like almost everybody was doing. Her husband simply ignored her and aimed at the closest vehicle. Kaliga looked at Sdermila, silently pleading for help.

"Divanian," she called, "take that weapon down, you fool! All you're going to do is get yourself killed!" He didn't seem to have even heard her. "Taigor always said you were an idiot and he sure was right." That comment made Divanian toss an angry look at her, but he didn't reply. The man stayed where he was, following the armored vehicle with the cannon of his rifle. "I just can't believe he is so stupid..." Sdermila muttered. She started to move away from him and closer to her house. Kaliga also made two steps back, but she didn't dare to leave her husband alone. The Seibergian were no further than a hundred meters now. Divanian shouted at them not to get any closer.

One of the vehicles shot a high energy burst.

The shockwave made Sdermila fall to the ground. She felt like a giant, hot hand, had smashed her in the face. When she was able to lift her head, she saw what remained of the Divanian house. There was no trace of its owners, but Sdermila knew they had to be dead, literally disintegrated. The two speeder-tanks had stopped fifty meters away, waiting for a group of soldiers to catch up with them. Sdermila's ears were buzzing, and her nose was bleeding a bit, but otherwise she was not wounded. She ran towards her house and took her coat, although she was sweating intensely, and wiped the blood away from her nose with the handkerchief that she found in the pocket. "Think, Sdermila, think," she whispered. Sdermila knew that she could not carry too many things. Her old kalahorse, the same that had killed Taigor but that she could not afford to sacrifice, as her sons had asked her to do, could not carry too much weight, not now. She tried to decide what was the most valuable thing she could take with her. Shouts in Seibergian and Basic were heard through the now broken windows. She had no time.

Sdermila put the stew in a plastic container and came out through the kitchen door.
 
 

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